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Eating Out with Kids:
Restaurant Behavior
From The No-Cry Discipline
Solution (McGraw-Hill 2007) by Elizabeth Pantley
Children can be both excited and
bored when at a restaurant. They can find it difficult to sit in one
place for the length of time necessary to order, wait, eat, and pay for
the meal. This problem is one that improves with age, development and
practice. With a good game plan, you can help your children learn how to
behave appropriately in a restaurant so that you can all enjoy the
experience.
What to do
Pick the right restaurant.
Choose a restaurant based on its
level of child-friendliness. What’s important? The availability of a
children’s menu that includes food your kids will actually eat. The
absence of a long wait for a table. Booster seats or high chairs.
Private booths or eating nooks as opposed to one large open room. And a
noisier, family-friendly atmosphere.
Teach restaurant manners at
home.
If you are casual about mealtime
manners at home, don’t expect your children to miraculously develop
table manners because you happen to be sitting in a restaurant. Practice
good manners at home for every meal, and your children will be prepared
when you eat out.
Have longer sit-down meals at home.
Typically, at home we call our
children to the table when all the food is ready, and then excuse them
as soon as they are finished eating. If you want to practice for
restaurant visits it’s a good idea to have them come to the table a few
minutes earlier. Then sit and chat for a bit after you are finished with
the meal. Make it fun by telling stories or jokes or talking about
upcoming plans. Not only will this be great practice for eating out,
it’s a wonderful ritual to introduce into your home.
Dine out at your regular meal
time.
When possible, stick close to
your routine. Plan to dine at a reasonable time, before the kids become
famished and tired. If you must go out later than your usual time, then
provide your children with a snack at the normal time, and allow them to
have a smaller meal at the restaurant, or to eat half the meal and bring
the rest home.
Review your restaurant rules
before you go.
Be very specific and leave no
stone unturned. A sample list of “restaurant rules” might be: Sit in
your seat. Use a quiet inside voice. Use your silverware, not your
fingers. Have nice conversation, no bickering. If you don’t like
something, keep your comments to yourself and fill up on something else.
If you have to use the restroom, ask me privately and I’ll take you.
Ask for an immediate
appetizer.
Many restaurants automatically bring bread or chips to the table as
soon as you are seated. If this isn’t the case, ask for something to be
brought out for the kids.
Prevent boredom.
Bring along a few simple toys,
like a deck of cards, plastic animals, or small quiet toys that can keep
the kids occupied while they wait.
Mother-speak:
“We ask for to-go boxes and the check at the same
time we order our food. This way, if we have to leave because of a
tired or whiny child, we can make a fast get away.”
Reagan, mother to
Hailey, age 2
What not to do
Don’t imagine that
eating out with kids is the same as dining without them.
When you take children to a restaurant the focus is not the cuisine
or the atmosphere. It’s all about controlling the excitement and
boredom, teaching your children formal manners, and having quality
family time.
Don’t stay too long
after eating.
Keep your post-meal conversation short. The longer you stay, the
more likely your children will run out of patience and act up.
Don’t make them eat
what they don’t like.
Stick with familiar foods when
possible. If the grilled cheese sandwich your child ordered turns out to
be Swiss cheese on sourdough allow your child to eat the French fries
and pack up the sandwich. A restaurant is not the place to battle over
new and unfamiliar foods.
Don’t stay if you’re
not having fun.
If a child’s behavior gets out of hand, take her to the restroom or
out to the car for a time out so that she can calm down. If she
continues to misbehave, don’t be afraid to ask for doggie bags and leave
the restaurant. But don’t give up. Review your expectations and try
again.
Excerpted with permission by McGraw-Hill Publishing from The
No-Cry Discipline Solution (McGraw-Hill 2007) by Elizabeth Pantley
http://www.pantley.com/elizabeth
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